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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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But then, outta nowhere, this group of teenagers shows up, blasting music. I’m talking full-on concert vibes. I’m like, “Dude, chill! This ain’t Coachella!” But then, I see them dancing, and I can’t help but join in. We’re all just vibing, and it’s like, “Forget the world, we’re just here to have fun!”

Rama to continue pushing for ’Singapore-like Cebu City’ if reelected